Chronically Well Wisdom: Uncovering Insights From Life With Chronic Illness
Is there an upside to life with chronic illness?
While there might not be many, I have found that there is at least one upside - a chance to uncover wisdom that might otherwise have remained hidden.
That wisdom relates to distilling what genuinely matters and learning to trust our inner guidance.
I am reminded of clients who have drilled down to what really matters most. For example, I have clients who have changed jobs to find better and more supportive employment. I have seen clients realize that they need more support in their home. These clients have either delegated tasks to loved ones or hired outside help so that they can spend more of their precious energy doing what matters most to them (like using their energy to go to their child’s recital rather than folding laundry).
It is only because of the clarity that these clients gained that they were able to make some big and small decisions that ended up creating a life more aligned with what works best for them.
Gaining this type of clarity and acting upon it takes time. This is a process for each of us and the outcome is particular to the individual - because we are all different.
When you think about any wisdom gained from living with the challenges of chronic illness, what do you think of?
One of my biggest pieces of learned wisdom has been trusting myself more. That has resulted in some shifts in my life, and what I consider to be a gained superpower that I will tell you about below. I am sharing some of my Chronically Well Wisdom here in the hope that you can notice how these hard-won lessons can ultimately empower you to live a more intentional life that is aligned with what you want most.
Chronically Well Nuggets Of Wisdom
One - Listen To Your body
This has been the biggest game-changer for me. I used to try to push through symptoms and low energy in an attempt to shoehorn my illness into my life. I spent years doing this and the result was that I was exhausted and maintained a regular cycle of getting sick.
When I finally leaned into listening to my body and aligning my expectations of what I could do in a day with what was possible, my life and health started to change for the better. I stopped shaming myself for not doing *everything.* I started to learn that I had different types of days. Some days I could do all the things. And, other days, not so much. When I finally started to respect and listen to my body’s signals, it was frustrating, but game-changing.
This hard-learned wisdom serves as the basis for a lot of my work with my clients and is foundational to the Chronically Well program. If you have been trying to shoehorn your chronic illness into your life, I invite you to read THIS blog post to find a practical approach to meeting yourself as you are. And, check out THIS blog post for more info on accepting the practicalities of life with chronic illness.
two - use your informed intuition
Another part of trusting myself has been trusting my informed intuition.
I stopped taking advice at face value. I had been told by multiple doctors that there was nothing I could do to improve my health (specifically related to my immune function and autoimmune issues) or to improve my chances of avoiding another round of lymphoma treatment. I was essentially doomed.
However, at some point, I thought that can’t possibly be true. While there might not be a magic pill for me, there were certainly lifestyle choices I could make to at least work on my underlying health.
When I started to look into what I could do, and experiment with that, I surprised myself and actually started to feel better. I found out about food sensitivities, airborne allergens, and started working on my underlying health. I went from a pure traditional medical approach, to opening up to supporting my underlying wellness through both traditional and integrative approaches AND self-prescribed lifestyle changes.
While my lifestyle changes have not been magical in curing all the things I have going on, they have certainly helped clear up some of my health issues, improved some of the others, and have given me a better quality of life. I have avoided a third round of cancer treatment for almost 20 years! I never thought that was possible based on the medical advice I was given.
Read more about embracing your informed intuition HERE.
three - find clarity
WARNING: Clarity may result in Bullshit Intolerance
An additional piece of wisdom that I, and many of my clients, have benefited from is finding clarity. Once you get really clear on what you need and want to make your life with chronic illness work for you, your priorities tend to shift. And, those clear priorities become helpful in determining where to spend your time and energy.
They can also help you to sort out the bullshit.
Let’s sit with that for a minute…Bullshit Intolerance is a superpower that you can use to live a more intentional and less bothered life.
For example, if you know that you are experiencing pain or fatigue and your healthcare provider does not believe you, you can call bullshit. You can ask them to note your symptoms in your chart and they are refusing to treat it or refer you to a specialist, etc. You can look for another provider who believes you and can support you through it. While any healthcare provider might not have all the answers, starting from a place where you feel respected, rather than dismissed, is important.
Or, if you are feeling pressured by yourself or people in your social circle to show up for events or responsibilities that seem unwise based on your symptoms, you can call bullshit. Yes, you can call bullshit on yourself. I do it all the time! When you know that doing something is not good for your health, you have the option to not succumb to the pressure - whether it is in your own head or someone else’s.
Having clarity and the resulting bullshit intolerance can help you to make choices about where to spend your precious and limited energy. Live YOUR life, in YOUR way.
For more reading about finding clarity on your priorities, read THIS blog post about ruthless prioritization.
Find YOUR way
To live Chronically Well! Explore how to work with me through my THRIVE or Chronically Well coaching options.
All of this is to say that you are your own best expert.
Listening to what both your mind and body are telling you, and knowing when something feels right and when it doesn’t - is an important part of finding your path to living Chronically Well in your own way.
These hard-won lessons are foundational to living Chronically Well and the work I do with my clients. We work together to develop a plan for all your different types of days so that you can lean into your mind/body wisdom and meet yourself where you are everyday (read more HERE). And, we make room for taking slow and steady steps towards long-term goals in a way that is supportive and shame-free.
It’s all about using your inner wisdom to create a life that works for you as you are today - with no bullshit.
What wisdom have you gained from life with chronic illness? How has that wisdom led to a greater sense of empowerment in your life?
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